When I fantasized about my dream guy, as a young girl, I imagined a guy that rocks. Be careful what you wish for. God really does have a sense of humour. You see, in my minds' eye I saw a musical bohemian who played an instrument and more than likely had a tattoo. I never foresaw this.
His majesty has been battling these jolly kidney stones for almost 10 years.. After we married, he went for a medical to take out health insurance and it threw up an abnormality. So since June 2002 we have been to and from winkie noodle doctors, hospitals, specialists, dieticians and we even tried the homeopath. I was almost really close to getting his majesty to commit to Pilates! he claims he came to his senses just in time.
We have noticed a 2 year cycle. It goes like this
He goes green around the gills one day and gets a pain in his back
He goes to the winkie noodle man
He is in hospital within 24 hours and has some sort of high falutin treatment
Passes gemstones for a few weeks
Goes for a post op scan and gets the "all clear"
We live happily until one day about 2 years on he goes green around the gills and we start again.
They say passing stones is akin to childbirth. Well, I had a baby and I'v never had stones. I cannot compare but just the look on his majestys' face when the stones are passing from his kidney to his bladder says it all. I often wonder the damage it's causing to his "wiring". His "plumbing". He says he's fine but I'm not so sure. Yesterday he started giving birth again and by 8pm we were the round parents of a multiple brood. I won't bother naming this lot. They will go into a speciman jar labelled "Stones - 2012 edition" and will be stored with the predecessors. Bet they all have a lot to talk about.
To date he has passed almost 100g of stones. I know, I weighed them on the kitchen scale last night. Obviously they have been cleaned.
Oh if only they were diamonds, all our troubles would be over and we could finally indulge in that overseas holiday we've been yearning for.
So this latest noodle-olo-gist has issued some food bans, namely cocoa. His majesty is a chocoholic. He is very sad about this news. I am also shattered as my baking revolved around chocolate for the most part. I am so desperate some days I consider snorting cocoa powder just for a "hit". His majesty went out to a study group the other day and I stayed home. I made a batch of chocolate icing and sat in front of the telly scooping it up with boudoir biscuits! Shame on me!
Amongst others is brocolli and carbonated drinks. No biggie. We're too poor to order anything that requires a mixer. So we exist off caffiene and H2O.
And the kidneys will possibly have a reprieve until 2014. But there's no guarantees.
