The king is a rocker. Who knew?
When I fantasized about my dream guy, as a young girl, I imagined a guy that rocks. Be careful what you wish for. God really does have a sense of humour. You see, in my minds' eye I saw a musical bohemian who played an instrument and more than likely had a tattoo. I never foresaw this.
His majesty has been battling these jolly kidney stones for almost 10 years.. After we married, he went for a medical to take out health insurance and it threw up an abnormality. So since June 2002 we have been to and from winkie noodle doctors, hospitals, specialists, dieticians and we even tried the homeopath. I was almost really close to getting his majesty to commit to Pilates! he claims he came to his senses just in time.
We have noticed a 2 year cycle. It goes like this
He goes green around the gills one day and gets a pain in his back
He goes to the winkie noodle man
He is in hospital within 24 hours and has some sort of high falutin treatment
Passes gemstones for a few weeks
Goes for a post op scan and gets the "all clear"
We live happily until one day about 2 years on he goes green around the gills and we start again.
They say passing stones is akin to childbirth. Well, I had a baby and I'v never had stones. I cannot compare but just the look on his majestys' face when the stones are passing from his kidney to his bladder says it all. I often wonder the damage it's causing to his "wiring". His "plumbing". He says he's fine but I'm not so sure. Yesterday he started giving birth again and by 8pm we were the round parents of a multiple brood. I won't bother naming this lot. They will go into a speciman jar labelled "Stones - 2012 edition" and will be stored with the predecessors. Bet they all have a lot to talk about.
To date he has passed almost 100g of stones. I know, I weighed them on the kitchen scale last night. Obviously they have been cleaned.
Oh if only they were diamonds, all our troubles would be over and we could finally indulge in that overseas holiday we've been yearning for.
So this latest noodle-olo-gist has issued some food bans, namely cocoa. His majesty is a chocoholic. He is very sad about this news. I am also shattered as my baking revolved around chocolate for the most part. I am so desperate some days I consider snorting cocoa powder just for a "hit". His majesty went out to a study group the other day and I stayed home. I made a batch of chocolate icing and sat in front of the telly scooping it up with boudoir biscuits! Shame on me!
Amongst others is brocolli and carbonated drinks. No biggie. We're too poor to order anything that requires a mixer. So we exist off caffiene and H2O.
And the kidneys will possibly have a reprieve until 2014. But there's no guarantees.
About that Pilates!?!?!?
Her majesty has just had another growth spurt. The gazzillion-th this year alone. If it's not the monthly purchase of shoes it's the sudden shrinking of the leggings I bought 3 months ago. I have been able to handle, whilst hemlines may have got shorter over summer, unless the armholes or crotch are death-defyingly tight I have chosen to ignore this.
We were blessed last winter when Beloved Cousin Rachel passed along some second hand windbreakers/windcheaters/pufferjackets or whatever you want to call them. But within the last month these have navigated up past madam's waistband are are pretty much useless in cold weather. So I have been prowling the shops for a few weeks now looking out for something in my realm of acceptable. I don't bow to fashion in any way myself and also since having a sprog I err on the side of practicality versus cuteness. Until she's old enough to buy her own stuff this is what she's getting.
So this a.m. I drag ourselves to XYZ store to look for a new coat. There they have it. Pink. Melton. Long-ish. In madam's size. It's a third of the price of the more labell-y type stores and a pittance in comparison to the kiddie boutiques (yes, they do exist!).
I would like to add that we live in Cape Town. Winters here have been known to last 7months. They are cold. Wet. Mouldy. Long. People start to smell like mushrooms. And yet, I wander into another clothes store this week and all the winter woolies have been usurped by string tops and hot-pants!?!?!? Erm, did I miss something. The last thing in my mind is choosing some new shorts when it's raining buckets outside and the mercury is barely managing to claw past 10C.
Anyhoo, XYZ store have marked most of their kiddies clothes down to half.....fine by me. R40 for a pufferjacket now. It's going to be trashed before October anyway so I'm not going to fall to pieces if it does.
What a mish just getting the sproglet to stand still and try anything on. Our sproglet is an odd shape right now. She is long and leggy, I'd like to say like her Mama, and her feet are rapidly becoming enormous, hmmmm, also like her Mama's?!? And she's only 2. So I am insistant that we try everything on before we buy. Of late the mass-produced clothing industry deems you cannot be tall and skinny at the same time. So we have ended up with everything being 4-5yrs. Shocker!
Madam is also going through a phase of defiance. I was not prepared for it to start so early! "I don't like it!" seems to punctuate her dialogues. From "I don't like jelly (her fave!) " to "I don;t like my feet, take them off!". Whatever. So I left XYZ store today with 1 coat and 2 windbreakers, none of which her majesty "likes". I hope she wakes up in a more agreeable mood on the morrow.
She is making me mental. Thankfully the welfare weren't at XYZ store as I may have been arrested.
